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My dogs testicles are caught in a mouse trap?
Estrella
Registered User
User ID: 203891
12-26-2013 05:47 AM

Posts: 3,897



Post: #1
My dogs testicles are caught in a mouse trap?
My Doberman usually sleeps in the garage so I let him in there a few minutes ago, forgetting that I had placed a few mouse traps there. The dog is still relatively young and has testicles the size of tennis balls. Apparently he was dragging those monsters too close to a trap and it snapped right on his nuts. He's really angry right now and won't let me get close enough to help, he already bit me really hard and I'm bleeding pretty bad.. I tried shooting him with a horse tranquilizer dart but I missed and it blew out one of the tires on my car so I can't drive to the vet or anything. My plan right now is to have my 3 year old niece approach it from the front to distract the dog while I sneak up behind him and club him with a tire iron. Does anyone have a better idea?

(...USER WAS BANNED FOR THIS POST)
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Pi
Infinity
User ID: 3.14159265
12-26-2013 05:48 AM

 



Post: #2
My dogs testicles are caught in a mouse trap?
Estrella  Wrote: (12-26-2013 05:47 AM)
My Doberman usually sleeps in the garage so I let him in there a few minutes ago, forgetting that I had placed a few mouse traps there. The dog is still relatively young and has testicles the size of tennis balls. Apparently he was dragging those monsters too close to a trap and it snapped right on his nuts. He's really angry right now and won't let me get close enough to help, he already bit me really hard and I'm bleeding pretty bad.. I tried shooting him with a horse tranquilizer dart but I missed and it blew out one of the tires on my car so I can't drive to the vet or anything. My plan right now is to have my 3 year old niece approach it from the front to distract the dog while I sneak up behind him and club him with a tire iron. Does anyone have a better idea?

Star the car and let the carbon monoxide knock him out.
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The Evil AC
I am not a number!!!
User ID: 666
12-26-2013 05:49 AM

 



Post: #3
My dogs testicles are caught in a mouse trap?
Yes. Find your dog a new home, then leave this board and never come back.
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Grumpy Bastard
Banned
User ID: 203852
12-26-2013 05:50 AM

Posts: 494



Post: #4
My dogs testicles are caught in a mouse trap?
LMAO
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Troll Wrangler
Registered User
User ID: 202208
12-26-2013 05:50 AM

Posts: 146



Post: #5
My dogs testicles are caught in a mouse trap?
Lmao
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morphic oceans
lop guest
User ID: 136461
12-26-2013 05:53 AM

 



Post: #6
My dogs testicles are caught in a mouse trap?
Estrella  Wrote: (12-26-2013 05:47 AM)
My Doberman usually sleeps in the garage so I let him in there a few minutes ago, forgetting that I had placed a few mouse traps there. The dog is still relatively young and has testicles the size of tennis balls. Apparently he was dragging those monsters too close to a trap and it snapped right on his nuts. He's really angry right now and won't let me get close enough to help, he already bit me really hard and I'm bleeding pretty bad.. I tried shooting him with a horse tranquilizer dart but I missed and it blew out one of the tires on my car so I can't drive to the vet or anything. My plan right now is to have my 3 year old niece approach it from the front to distract the dog while I sneak up behind him and club him with a tire iron. Does anyone have a better idea?

If you had placed friendly mouse traps instead this would never have happened. They would have tickled his balls and he would be licking your face now.
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Frodgers
Registered User
User ID: 166785
12-26-2013 05:54 AM

Posts: 4,174



Post: #7
My dogs testicles are caught in a mouse trap?
This is what you need to do..

Go to the shops and get...

a piece of string
a mars bar
3 safety pins
52 playing cards
a packet of salt and vinegar chips
17 mousketeers ears
a roll of tape
a bottle of vodka

Come home and drink the vodka and eat the chips and mars bar and then you have a lot of handy things left over.

Wasn't that easy

_______________________________________________________

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countries because you were born in it"

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Helen Reddy
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LoP Guest
lop guest
User ID: 167970
12-26-2013 05:55 AM

 



Post: #8
My dogs testicles are caught in a mouse trap?
Content removed, please report this thread/post
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LoP Guest
lop guest
User ID: 204510
12-26-2013 05:56 AM

 



Post: #9
My dogs testicles are caught in a mouse trap?
Wow that's a crappy Christmas present to give your dog.
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CourtDude staff
I am the Eye in the Sky, Looking at You.
User ID: 208212
12-26-2013 05:57 AM

Posts: 28,486



Post: #10
My dogs testicles are caught in a mouse trap?
OMG +5 ROFL


LOP Technical User Guide for Guests and Members


When you are good or sincere, you become food for ones that are not.
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LoP Guest
lop guest
User ID: 202096
12-26-2013 06:23 AM

 



Post: #11
My dogs testicles are caught in a mouse trap?
Put a tourniquet around his neck, remove the mouse trap and kiss his poor boo boo.
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NormalIsSubjective

User ID: 207571
12-26-2013 06:23 AM

Posts: 7,957



Post: #12
My dogs testicles are caught in a mouse trap?
Why the hell is your dog tea-bagging a mousetrap?
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LoP Guest
lop guest
User ID: 183115
12-26-2013 06:28 AM

 



Post: #13
My dogs testicles are caught in a mouse trap?
Your dog, ok. Wink wink. You should go to the emergency room asap , they see this kind of thing all the time.
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LoP Guest
lop guest
User ID: 205975
12-26-2013 06:43 AM

 



Post: #14
My dogs testicles are caught in a mouse trap?
Estrella  Wrote: (12-26-2013 05:47 AM)
My Doberman usually sleeps in the garage so I let him in there a few minutes ago, forgetting that I had placed a few mouse traps there. The dog is still relatively young and has testicles the size of tennis balls. Apparently he was dragging those monsters too close to a trap and it snapped right on his nuts. He's really angry right now and won't let me get close enough to help, he already bit me really hard and I'm bleeding pretty bad.. I tried shooting him with a horse tranquilizer dart but I missed and it blew out one of the tires on my car so I can't drive to the vet or anything. My plan right now is to have my 3 year old niece approach it from the front to distract the dog while I sneak up behind him and club him with a tire iron. Does anyone have a better idea?

LMFAO......THIS THREADS MADE MY DAY...IS THAT YOU IN THE AVATAR? iF SO, PLEASE SEND ME SOME PICS...
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LoP Guest
lop guest
User ID: 207382
12-26-2013 06:43 AM

 



Post: #15
My dogs testicles are caught in a mouse trap?
I don't suppose you got that on video? Lmao
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