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The Parable of the Poo Salesman, a creative writing piece
Hamburgerwagon
Banned
User ID: 488835
02-12-2019 04:22 PM

Posts: 2,442



Post: #1
The Parable of the Poo Salesman, a creative writing piece
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PART I

John was in a rush home from work and remembered he still needed to get some gifts and supplies for his sons birthday party. He stopped at the mall and was hoping to make a quick trip in and out. As he was walking through the mall he was confronted with a salesman at a kiosk who wanted him to buy some perfume. John though "Hey, my wife might like this", so he took a look at what the salesman had to offer.

As the salesman opened the box, John noticed a strange odor. It smelled like sh*t. He asked the salesman what was in the box and the salesman assured him it was perfume. Upon closer inspection, John noticed that it was indeed sh*t in the box. John asked "Why are you trying to peddle sh*t off disguised as perfume?" The salesman took offense to this and assured John that indeed perfume is what he was selling, not sh*t.

John didn't know how to respond, so he blurted out "No, that is sh*t, and you are a sh*t salesman. I'm going to contact the mall manager and let him know you are selling sh*t in here." The salesman was offended and told John he needed to quit lying about him and to just leave and not buy any perfume if he didn't want any. "You mean sh*t?", John said. 'I'm calling the manager over here. This is just wrong."

To be continued......
(This post was last modified: 02-12-2019 04:28 PM by Hamburgerwagon.)
LoP Guest
lop guest
User ID: 485447
02-12-2019 05:12 PM

 



Post: #2
RE: The Parable of the Poo Salesman, a creative writing piece
So...is this your idea of breaking the 'no sh*t threads' rule?
Hamburgerwagon
Banned
User ID: 488835
02-12-2019 05:20 PM

Posts: 2,442



Post: #3
RE: The Parable of the Poo Salesman, a creative writing piece
PART II

John goes and get the manager of the mall and explains to him what is going on with this guy trying to sell sh*t but telling people it is perfume. The manager take a look at the merchandise and comes to a conclusion. "There is no problem here ", says the manager. "This man is selling perfume, and he is welcome to sell it here anytime. "

John is shocked and bewildered. He thanks them both for their time and continues on his way. As he meanders through the mall he notices other people selling the exact same perfume at several other kiosks. Curious, he wanders by each salesperson only to be greeted with the familiar smell of sh*t which he smelled at the other salesman kiosk. "There is a coordinated effort to sell sh*t disguised as perfume here", John thinks to himself.

John decided he needed to take action and blurted out, "Dont buy the perfume. The perfume is sh*t, the perfume is sh*t!" His exclamation echoed down the long corridors of the mall. This grabbed the attention of one of the security guards. She came over and told John that she would have to ask him to leave if he didn't calm down. John explained what was going on to her, and what the manager said. "Look, I don't know what you are talking about, but the manager said they can sell the perfume so they can sell the perfume, got it? I need this job, it's all I have in life. I can't lose it so I just do what I'm told and you will do what you are told or I will remove you from the mall. Got it?"

To be continued....
silversides staff
Truth Prevails
User ID: 148291
02-12-2019 05:43 PM

Posts: 12,934



Post: #4
RE: The Parable of the Poo Salesman, a creative writing piece
LoP Guest  Wrote: (02-12-2019 05:12 PM)
So...is this your idea of breaking the 'no sh*t threads' rule?

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